Christian dating advice purity

Indeed, American culture seems determined to mock and ridicule chastity as much as possible.And why is chastity so “dear to heaven,” so important to God’s vision of discipleship and faithful Christian living?But it would be, I think, irresponsible to discuss the importance of chastity without making two related points.First, chastity is not the only, or even the most important, aspect of Christian discipleship. ” Second, by Jesus’ standard, the standard of lusting in our hearts, every one of us has sexual sin to deal with.Abstinence before marriage, and fidelity within marriage — refraining from sex with someone other than your husband or wife — is just one of those basic rules that keeps you inside the Christian community. Practicing premarital chastity is also important because it safeguards and protects marital sex — that is, it protects us, so that if and when we do get married, we are able to experience sex as God intended it to be. Think about the TV shows or movies you’ve seen, in which people have premarital sex. It is almost always portrayed as being — because, almost by definition, it is part of a relationship that is itself not wholly stable.Even when you’ve been dating someone for a year, the lack of permanence that characterizes your relationship seems to add a certain frisson to everything you do with that person, from going on a Saturday hike to smooching on the sofa. It becomes a ritual in itself; it becomes a routine.

Chastity is important because it involves how we comport our bodies — and through faith, our bodies are no longer our own.

Everything in your relationship gets some of its charge from the uncertainty, the unknown. Married sex is exciting, but its excitements are very different, and much more tender, than the instability of the hook-up scene.

This may be the single most significant way that married sex — sex as it was created to be — differs from unmarried sex. The sex of blind dates and fraternity parties, even of relatively long-standing dating relationships has, simply, no normal qualities.

In faith, you have become part of Christ’s body, and it is Christ through the Church, who must give you permission to join His body to another body. The place where the Church confers that privilege on you is the wedding; weddings are specific acts that grant us permission to have sex with one person. The New Testament makes clear that sex beyond the boundaries of marriage — the boundaries of communally granted sanction of sex — is simply off limits.

To have sex outside those bounds is to commit an offense against the body.

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Most importantly, guidelines and principles for dating will transform lives and shape eternities. The brokenness you see in yourself and the brokenness you experience from your spouse point both of you to the only perfect one, God. When you pull the trigger, these balls spread over a large range, increasing the chance you hit the target.

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